“Death, spirit me away. My anguished soul doth strain on taut and twisted reins. Yet, insatiate I still remain, like a proud, unfallen star, that dares thee from afar, to calm my thunderous heart. Else, rend its knots apart so I may never sing. Of jeweled skies o’er my strings, and love, a wanton thing. Can plunge on burnt, black wings, to hang amid the thorns, in scarlet, like velvet worn about the clouded moon, who wanes in solitude. I am alone, thirsting for the dark that lurks beneath marbled stone. What black witchcraft shalt prise me from my dreams of thee, and what perverse world-strategy will wend its way with me from this deep slumber caused by thy curse of beauty?”

(Taken and modified from the song Beauty Slept in Sodom, by Cradle of Filth)

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Beauty. A word that describes an attractive feature or advantage, a combination of qualities that delights the aesthetic senses. And from that word, a proverb was born:

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“beauty is in the eye of the beholder”

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Which means something which one person finds beautiful or admirable may not appeal to another. Simple, yet meaningful – deeply. Like an art, created by an artist, yet the beauty of it can only be distinguished by those who have the precise angle of perception and interest – those who have the ‘love’ for art, a lover of art. Seems that beauty cannot escape from the discreet seductive relationship with love. And it will always be.

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As I proceed with the continuum of my journey to seek power in expanding my legacy, to surf the wide, borderless cyber world for such random matters, I encountered something – or in a manner of speaking, ‘someone’ – who stunned me. Such beauty, splendor, exquisiteness, gorgeousness and magnificence. Her gaze struck my heart deeply, deeper than the strike of Jordan Capri. It was a lady named Raven Riley.

Raven haircut

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I was really stunned by her beauty. I realized she was not as cute as Jordan Capri. Her skin was far beyond like Jordan Capri – as if it was tanned naturally, neither too dark nor too fair. She was not even petite at all compared to the Queen of Cute. Yet, I stunned. As if I was paralyzed by her charming hypnotic eyes, her grace and her astonishing smile.

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I realized that she wasn’t even close to Jenna Jameson, Andi Pink, Alison Angel or other porn stars. But still, my interest to her became deeper and deeper. I just can’t get enough of her beauty, her facial expressions, her smile, and especially her gaze. I don’t know why I am so attracted to her. Perhaps the main cause is her eyes. Possibly also her hair. I really don’t know why. They seem normal, but why they attract me so much and awaken my urge of enquiry to know more about her?

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Why? How did this happen? Who’s to blame? Well, truthfully, beauty is subjective. As of the taste of food, we have our own favorite, the flavor that we prefer the most. To some people, Siti Nurhaliza, Maria Anastasia De Souza Sharapova, Jennifer Lopez, Maya Karin or Fasha Sandha may be the beauty of all. But to me, they were out of my taste – rejects (in a harsh word). But for some people, even if my taste was a reject, it becomes my favorites: Jordan Capri, Raven Riley, Eisya, Anastasia Kovba, Zakiah Anas, Yushanani Yushak, Skye McCole Bartusiak.

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All of our life, we were conned by the conspiracy of the media, to set our course of mind to follow the ‘guide’ of beauty that we should believe in, as shown by the commercial models, beauty pageants, and actresses. While the truth is, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. That is why, for me, porn itself is an art, whereby beauty is not determined by the majority, but the person who seeks the ‘category’ or ‘genre’ that suits him/her lust satisfaction of perception.

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There were a myriad of people, various types of persons, and different choices of perception towards beauty in porn. Just name the category; teens, petite, babes, ebony, pregnant, lingerie, voyeurism, Asians, blondes, redhead, brunettes, cheerleaders, mature, messy, gothic, and many more.

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I’m not saying that porn is good. What I am focusing here is about the perception of people towards it. Well, the reality is, for most people, and I mean the majority (if we consider the society in this country) will have the negative perception of it, due to the ‘taboo’ human part that should be kept hidden, not shown to public and produce chaos to immature minds.

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But what if we (only to perverts who love porn, not normal civilians who hate porn) just neglect the ‘taboo’ part, and focusing on the beauty side, not the lust part. Yes, I know it’s hard. As an experienced pervert, I know it is very difficult just to seek porn stars, especially amateur porn models wearing clothes in a porn site. Because their job is to take off their clothes, not wearing them like fashion models.

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The most beautiful being in earth is of course human being. They are the most beautiful, the most complete, the most highly engineered design, and also the most complex of all. Everything, every living or non-living beings on earth can be simplified in a human being. Yes, it sounds like crap, but that’s the reality. You seek rivers in a human body? Their veins can match that. Or would you seek:

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• Waterfall = Just go peeing in the toilet, you’ll get one.

• Grass = Check your hairy parts.

• Trunk of a tree = Male human got one, but leafless.

• Branches of trees = Our hands, fingers.

• Stone = As if Hajar Aswad. You’ll know what I mean.

• Mountains = Well, your pervert mind should know the part of human body (female) that can symbolized that.

• Volcano (active) = In simpler term, we use the word ‘ejaculation’.

• Volcano (not active) = We cannot have all the mountains to be an active volcano can’t we? If yes, we surely are in chaos and will live in fear.

• Volcano’s lava = Errr.. I think you know what it supposed to be.

• Stalactite / stalagmite = our teeth.

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And many more. For watery parts, we can relate them with the sea, the lake, the pond, etc. It’s up to our own perception and imagination of them. While our outer physical body parts can be related to geographical and topographic features of earth itself, our inner part can be related to the living beings in earth. Our antibody for example, is the police, hunters or soldiers. Our brain is as if the White House. Our heart could be the economic flow of a developed country. Our sexual organs are as if the agriculture industry of a country. Our stomach is the reactor of a well engineered plant – whereby:

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Mass in + Energy in = Mass out + Energy out + consumption + energy loss

(Mass and energy balance - MEB)

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Yes, I know. Even though I am a failure of Chemical Engineering with only third class honor, at least I still remember the basic equation of MEB. So, back to our vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose. Like a normal society in a normal country, each every cell has their own purpose, own tasks and duration of life in this whole wide planet that we call as ‘a human body’. And that is the beauty of it.

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But those analogies are too advance to explain beauty. It’s just an additional content for this blog. What we really want to focus on is on the outer beauty, the physical realm, whereby we could see the beauty, either the facial, the body, the boobs, or anything else which are visible through out our sight when we see a person – which in this entry, I am focusing on my beloved gorgeous lady, Raven Riley.

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How about the beauty of the inner side such as the character of the persona, the good and bad qualities, the habits or the beliefs of a person? Are those really important? Well, for people who tend to get married and live together, that would be accountably important. But truth be told, if we are looking in the corporate reality point of view, it’s just full of bullshit and lies.

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Why? Because people have a tendency to see the outer things first, the first impression for the qualities that has been set by other people, rather than the proverb ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder’. Just as in the earlier content in this entry, where beauty is set by other people – through fashion and trends – as if a conspiracy to set our mind about it, that is the reality happened in our ‘inconsequential’ world.

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If in the fashion and trend world, we sought to feel that beauty is symbolized by tall skinny models, the same happens in our society. The beauty of a person seeking a job (especially fresh graduates) is just seen through his/her CGPA and a piece of certificate paper, not his/her other uniqueness and good qualities. Well, even if we write either brief or lengthy resumes, the only thing matter is the CGPA (and some experience of course). Unless, in this example:

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A boss has to interview four girls for a secretary’s position. He thought of a question and asked each one of them:
Boss: "A woman normally has two mouths, What’s the difference between the two?"
The first one answered: One can talk but the other can’t.
Second answered: one is vertical and the other is horizontal.
Third answered: one is hairy, the other isn’t.

The last one answered: One is for my use and the other is for my boss.
Boss: You’re hired!

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While the truth is, a tall skinny model isn’t really our taste (for some of us including me, but some may do like skinny people) and would not satisfy our own desire for sex – she was too skinny, her bones might break as we hump her violently. Thus, we sought to seek a girl that met our ‘specs’ or have the qualities that we want, which satisfy us the most. But why companies tend to oppose their true nature? Is higher CGPA means that a person can do more work and has good interpersonal and intra-personal skills? What does an organization really want?

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We already know, all normal companies want to success in their world of business. But hiring people that do not really suit their need, conned by the majority’s perception (or is it the Human Resource’s perception?) of good employers just by the evaluation through the shadow of CGPA, is that really gonna make a big difference in their success, or just another futile effort and wasting time, money and energy of the company, which they will realize it later?

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Yes, there is something terribly wrong with our society. As if all of these were orchestrated by a very high positioned person, lurking in the shadows, but still, his/her plans were implemented well and effectively, just as he/she wants it to be so. Some may call it by the term ‘mental colonization’. While some may use a more ‘discreet’ term – ‘an uncle who pays us the money to college, but molested us’. I wish I am that person, have the power to do that, to maneuver the world to the direction that I want. But apparently, I am not. Sigh~

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It is as if I were given the choice to choose either Siti Nurhaliza or Eisya. And I can only choose one, and the rule is just stay with one and no polygamy. Of course I would prefer the beauty of Eisya (mmm~ petite~ yummy~), but since the majority said that Siti Nurhaliza is much better, I have no choice but to follow others just because I want to be the same level as others and just be ‘normal’. In the end, even if I am married to Siti, I will still not satisfy myself and would just have an affair with Eisya. Thus, the organization that was built only based on others perceptions (not own need and own satisfaction) will be corrupted just like that.

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Well, that one is when we take Malaysian celebrities as an example. Both are wives of other people anyway. If you are not comfortable with their status (other people’s wife), and for generalization purposes to match ‘single and still available’ persons as to uphold the ethics ‘not to disturb somebody else’s wife’, just change Siti Nurhaliza to Jordan Capri, and change Eisya to Raven Riley. As simple as that. But still, “the most beautiful wife is always somebody else’s wife”. LOL!!

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Possibly, that is what is meant by Kain’s speech:

“Given the choice. Whether to rule a corrupted failing empire, or to challenge the fate of another throw, a better throw against one’s destiny. What was a king to do? But does one truly ever have a choice? One can only match move by move the machinations of fate, and thus defy the tyrannous stars!”

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As for me, even though Raven Riley had succeeded in stunning and hypnotizing me with her beauty, I still put Jordan Capri on the top of the list. It’s not because of majority’s perception towards the beauty of both of them. It’s because Raven Riley’s beauty can only make me stunned, but Jordan Capri’s beauty can make me dream of heaven. Ouh Jordan Capri~ My Queen of Cute~ Nyia~ But still, Raven Riley shall not be forgotten, always resides in my mind side by side with Jordan Capri (They work in different porn company anyway).

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Seriously, if only I had a wife like Raven Riley, I would fuck her so hard till she cannot walk for a week. Nyiahahahahahah!! This irrational and illogical statement is just a fantasized imagination only. If I am really capable of doing it, surely I would love to make it happen. But then again, we live in a real world, reality must be considered. Either it can be done or not, let’s put the name to the test, shall we, my beloved Raven Riley? (wink~ wink~)

"On this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet to suggest the character of this dramatis persona.

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Voilá!

In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and veracious violation of volition.

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The only verdict is vengeance, a vendetta, held as a votive not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose. So let me simply add that it’s my very good honor to meet you, and you may call me Adi."

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(Taken and modified from the film V for Vendetta)

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To tell you the truth, those piece of dialogue costs me RM69.90 just to see, read, copy and write it. And that also include the speech in the head menu up there, the speech of V in the TV station.

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There is a time in our own life, where our mind will unleash it’s so called ‘craziness’ and ‘foolishness’, whereby sometimes we just do some brainless things, or in a Malay term, we call it as “masa ketika kepala tengah weng”. In that scrupulous time, we will just ignore some coherent things and just proceed with a non-beneficial plan that will only give us losses either in term of time, money or energy.

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One of the reasons is boredom, or perhaps we could include ‘loneliness’ in the list as well, whereby those two conspired to ploy our mind to do something, which in some foolish people point of view, a fascinating thing to do.

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Well, that was the obsession happened to me several weeks ago. While I was walking to acquire a movie ticket in GSC One Utama, a thought just cracked right into my head and advised me to buy a V for Vendetta DVD, the original one, as to examine the conversations in that legendary literature, philosophical movie. I fell for it (even though I can get that from YouTube). I was swindled by that unreasonable contemplation and sacrifice my own allowance just for that. For a moment of time, I felt foolish. But if I just could view it at the optimistic side, at least I ought to use each every intriguing art of speech and literature in that movie for my exploitation in my own blog, and also in my scheme of improving and learning English. It’s not that bad after all.

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When I track back to Entry 69, it was then, another time where that craziness and foolishness met together to derail history. And in that course of action, I had to sacrifice RM38.00 just to find a portion of my piece of puzzle in Entry 59 and Entry 60. What in the world was I doing? I have to pay RM38.00 just to make use only the only two pages in that book just to answer my inquiries? Well, if we look at the crazy and foolish point of view, it’s just natural. But at least it also used in the blog isn’t it?

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So, as to make use of that only two pages in the book, I now present to you, the other piece of answer for the so called Ayat 1000 Dinar.

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And here it goes:

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Terdapat suatu riwayat yang mengemukakan bahawa ayat ini (Surah ath Thalaaq: 65:3) diturunkan berkenaan dengan seseorang suku Asyja’ yang fakir dan ramai anak. Dia menghadap Rasulullah s.a.w. dan meminta bantuan dari baginda s.a.w. (tentang anak yang ditawan musuh dan tentang penderitaan hidupnya). Maka Rasulullah s.a.w. bersabda: “Bertakwalah kepada Allah dan perbanyakkan sabar.” Tidak lama kemudian, datanglah anaknya yang ditawan itu membawa seekor kambing (hasil rampasan dari musuh sewaktu melarikan diri). Perkara ini segera dilapor| kepada Rasulullah lalu baginda bersabda: “Makanlah (kambing itu).”

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Ayat ini (Surah at Thalaaq: 65: 2-3) menerangkan bahawa Allah memberi rezeki kepada umatnya tanpa disangka-sangka dan memberi jalan keluar kepada orang yang bertakwa.

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(Diriwayatkan oleh al Hakim dari Jabir)

(Diriwayatkan pula oleh Ibnu Jarir dari Salim bin Abi Ja’d)

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KETERANGAN

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Sesungguhnya az Zahabi berkata: "Riwayat ini mungkar tetapi mempunyai beberapa syahid (saksi). Menurut al Hakim pula dari lbnu Mas’ud dan as Suddi nama orang yang disebutkan itu ialah Auf al Asyja’i."

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Dalam riwayat lain dikemukakan bahawa Auf bin Malik al Asyja’i berjumpa Rasulullah s.a.w. dan berkata: “Anakku ditawan musuh, dan ibunya sangat gelisah. Apakah perintah tuan ke atasku?” Rasulullah s.a.w. bersabda: "Aku perintahkan agar engkau dan isterimu memperbanyakkan mengucap: La haula wala quwwata illa billah.” Lalu isterinya berkata: “Alangkah eloknya apa yang diperintahkan oleh Rasulullah kepadamu.” Maka, kedua pasangan suami isteri itu pun memperbanyakkan bacaan tersebut.

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Adapun, ketika musuh sedang lalai, anaknya yang ditawan itu membawa pulang kambing dari pihak musuh ke rumah bapanya. Oleh yang demikian, jelaslah bahawa ayat ini (Surah ath Thalaaq: 65:3) diturunkan adalah berkenaan dengan peristiwa tersebut yang menerangkan tentang jalan keluar bagi orang yang bertakwa.

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(Diriwayatkan oleh Ibnu Marduwaih dari al Kalbi dari Abi Salleh dari Ibnu Abbas)

(Diriwayatkan pula oleh al Khatib dari Juwaibir dari ad Dlahhak dari Ibnu Abbas)

(Diriwayatkan pula oleh ath Tha’labi dari sumber lain tetapi daif)

(K. Diriwayatkan oleh Ibnu Abi Hatim dari sumber lain tetapi mursal)

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I thought I want to write further. But since tonight is a special night for me to gain peace, tranquility and quiet, I rather stop here and proceed with my own mission of Prison Break Season 2.

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At least I search for the answer, not just sitting around like a lazy ass motherfucker and just give demotivating comments such as in Entry 59.

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Thus, the question is, how do we relate this piece of puzzle with all the previous entries? How do we relate, especially the ‘takwa’ part? Well, seems like we have a very long way to go.

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When reading Entry 72 about war and battles, it’s been a long time since I played DotA. However, that doesn’t mean I quit it already. Since I miss DotA so much, I dedicate this vclip to all DotA players:

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“Let’s get it on..!!”

(Dwarven Sniper, DotA)

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Remember what I’ve said in Entry 72? Now, it is proven that the film 300 can be included into the list. Oh, man. I just can’t get enough watching that epic war movie since I first watch it on 14 March. The lightings were so perfect as if it was translated directly from an ancient manuscript to the cinema screen. And I must say that this movie contains the elements that really suit my nature: 80% battles, 10% history, 5% politics, and 5% others (love, family, and whatever).

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“Spartans never retreat, never surrender..!!”

(King Leonidas, from the movie 300)

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The movie really intrigues me and arouses my urge to be a gay hunger for battle and thirst for power. What made that movie to be so ‘arousing’? It is the perfect blend of the music with the scenes. Most of war movies that we have seen use standard patriotic or ‘army’ songs. But in 300, the true “art” that made the battles so ‘arousing’ and chaotic but with great charismatic style is the electric guitar! Not many epic movies using such ‘modern’ instrument (they usually use classic orchestra instruments) in their soundtracks (exception for the movie A Knight’s Tale).

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Another thing that amuses me is the strategies used in the battles in that movie. How to face normal infantry, how to strengthen a wall, how to face the cavalry horsemen, how to face alchemists, and many more. The one that I like the most is on how to defeat the cavalry. They don’t fight the cavalry head on (like in Braveheart), but making a formation so that they can thrust their spears to the horsemen (or the horse itself) by the side. How did they do it? That one, you have to watch it yourself.

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And the most important thing, there are also armies from Japan – the ghost soldiers (askar hantu) just like in the comic Pedang Setiawan (the armies of Ateis Jati). They wear ghost mask to cover their damaged faces. To join the army, the soldier’s face must be destroyed by stamping a hot red steel mask to their face so that they are not recognized – to delete their identity. If they can bear the pain, they were then given a mask to cover their horrendous damaged face.

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There is a weakness of course in that movie. Even though the splattering blood effects are gruesome (and of course, more blood that The Chronicles Of Narnia – and I really mean it!!), the person who wields the weapon (including the king himself) was still dry. What’s the point of blood splattering here and there if the one slaying the enemy himself didn’t even involve in a “wet” bloodbath? How come still so dry and clean? Logically, if it is a “war”, there is no such thing as a “clean” slay.

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All in all, I really recommend you to watch this movie (especially while it is still hot in the cinema with surround systems). There is much uniqueness in that movie that must be discovered. And I really can’t tell it all couldn’t I? But if you have decided to be a gay after watching that movie, that is your own decision. I’m not responsible for it. Hahahahah!!

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Apa yang menarik perhatian aku untuk dibincangkan di sini ialah permulaan cerita tu sendiri. Di mana bayi yang lahir di Sparta akan diteliti terlebih dahulu. Jika terlalu kecil, terlalu besar atau cacat, maka bayi itu akan dihapuskan. Sebabnya? Supaya yang tinggal di Sparta hanyalah mereka yang sempurna. Huh, so much for a very ’perfect’ society huh? (But if I think it deeply, in fact, that is what I do in my blog. Bohahahahah!!)

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Bila difikirkan, ia menjurus ke arah persoalan apakah agaknya perasaan ibu bapa kepada anak tersebut? Dan bila diperdalami lagi persoalan tersebut, ia menjurus kepada persoalan adakah mereka sebenarnya nak beranak? Kita luaskan skop pula supaya menjadi lebih general (bukan sekadar dalam movie tu je). Maka timbullah persoalan:

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"Kalaulah cara untuk dapatkan anak tu bukan ikut cara mengongkek, adakah manusia nak terima tanggungjawab untuk bela anak?”

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Katalah Tuhan kasi ubah cara untuk dapat anak. Contohnya, kena kasi sperma tu tersejat, pastu buat dalam bentuk pil, pastu kasi pompuan telan je macam makan ubat. Adakah orang yang nak menerima tanggungjawab untuk bela anak? Ataupun kasi dalam bentuk yang lebih kompleks lagi – kena isi borang itu, borang ini, kena x-ray dsb (tu belum masuk lagi kes birokrasi kalau nak apply dapat anak kat Malaysia ni) – adakah manusia nak menerima tanggungjawab tersebut?

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Hatta dalam keadaan sekarang ini pun, kepada mereka yang sebaya dengan aku sekarang ni (yang dah pun mampu untuk buat anak), korang nak ke dapat anak pada masa sekarang ni? Kepada yang dah kahwin tu, adakah korang memang plan untuk dapat anak sekarang, ataupun adakah sebenarnya tak mau pun dapat anak (tapi plan untuk dapat anak lambat tu tak jadi sebab ”tidak mempunyai keazaman yang tinggi” sebagaimana istilah dalam buku sains sekolah menengah)?

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Do you get my point? What I want to say is, do human really want to receive that responsibility? The responsibility of taking care of another human being produced by their own flesh and blood. The responsibility is so heavy and not just for fun. It’s not just to take care the flesh and blood itself, but also the soul, the mentality, the life, supplies, and much more – which in the end it will be released just like that – to breed other colonies. And the cycle goes on and on and on from generation to generation.

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To sharp minded people or business type people, these questions might be asked:

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1. What’s the point of it anyway if it just ended like that?

2. What is the profit if we only gain loss?

3. Why should I take that responsibility anyway?

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To answer those questions we must first answer the core of the question; why do humans breed? Forget about sex (which we will discuss it after this anyway). Try to focus on that question.

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Well, for people who studied animals, they will surely give this answer:

“To pass on the DNA of one’s generation to another. A survival situation of whose DNA can survive until the end.”

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For people who study genetics, they might give this answer:

“To combine DNA from various types and to produce stronger generations in the future, as only the strong and more quality beings will inherit the earth as time passes by.”

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For religious freaks, this might be the answer:

“As to uphold the faith in God, to obey and be His servant and only His.”

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For business oriented people, this may be the answer:

“As the world is populated with more people, that means more customers and thus, more business opportunities!!”

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Answer from doctors:

“At last, my struggle for that fuckin’ scroll of degree and time wasted for it are now appreciated and used (also give me money).. If there are people, there are always sick people..!!”

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Answer from school teachers:

“Thank God.. At least I will always have my job..!!”

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For religion manipulators, they will give this answer:

“That’s why you should allow me to polygamy, my darling..”

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For married couples:

“It’s doggy style time..!!”

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For Michael Jackson:

“Mmm~ Yummy~” (drool)

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There are many versions of answers, depend on the type of person giving them. And thus, there is no specific right answer for the question. Apabila terlalu banyak sangat jawapan, terlalu banyak sangat versi, bermakna ia masih belum sampai lagi kepada perdu pokok perbincangan. Jawapan-jawapan tadi masih lagi pada ranting atau dahan, bukan perdunya. Maka kita perlu mengkaji lebih jauh lagi mengenai persoalan ”mengapa manusia membiak” tadi kepada satu perspektif yang apabila dilihat dari mana-mana segi sekali pun, tetap sama sahaja jawapannya. A question in which a very naive and curious kid will ask, where an adult him/herself will have headache to answer it:

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“Where do babies come from?”

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Do you know why adults have trouble to answer that question? It’s because to make the kid understand the WHERE, they must first explain the HOW. If not, the next question from the kid will be the ultimate killer question:

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“How do babies get in there anyway?”

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Well, if I were an irresponsible and evil father, I would just let my child watch the film Alien, Alien 2, Alien 3, and Alien VS Predator to answer that question. And when my wife is pregnant, then I would say to my child that my wife was infected by the aliens and soon, the alien will sprout out from her belly just like in the movie. I will give the child FEAR!! Bohahahahah!! Maybe what had been said by V in the film V For Vendetta is true after all:

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“There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reasons and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you. And in your panic, you turned to the now High Chancellor Adam Sutler. He promises you order, he promised you peace. And all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent.”

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Yes.. If I am that irresponsible and evil, I would just give fear to the child so that he/she will never ask a question that makes me have a headache to answer it. But that would make me the same as “The Others” or “The Poison Squad” wouldn’t it? Why would I be like them anyway? Why should I be at the same level of wickedness as the people that I hate the most?

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Now back to our discussion. Where were we? Oh, yes. When there are so many versions, we should narrow a bit our focus so that we can see a perspective whereby the question asked will give the same answer in any point of view. Thus, from the question “why do humans breed?”, we shift a bit our focus to the matter of “how do humans breed?”. There are of course many answers if we look it in a scientific point of view. But right now, we just focus on the normal answer for that question of ‘HOW’: By fucking.

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Yes, a harsh word. Either legal fucking via marriage or illegal one (which some people may call it as “premature sex” or “adultery”), that’s the reality – either legal or illegal, the act of doing it is the same anyway, the “righteous hole” you penetrate the “blunt sword” is also the same (which differs only in the manner of ‘style’). And in this special occasion, I will not ‘strikethrough’ that “F” word since that is the most truthful reality of the situation and the simplest and shortest term to type for this long entry. If you are not satisfied or uncomfortable with the use of that word, please shut the fuck up and go fuck yourself.

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Thus, fucking is the answer on HOW do humans breed. When we take this answer as the basis of our analysis, only then we can come back to the earlier question; the “WHY”. Why do humans breed? Or in a manner of speaking in an indirect way, why do humans fuck?

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I am not really interested by the hypocritical answers from those The Others or The Poison Squad such as “sebagai satu ibadah” or “cara yang halal untuk memuaskan nafsu”. They are just too lame for people like me (the bad guy type). You know why? Because when they give that “standard” answer, they don’t include the “explanation” of it – in which part of fucking that really made us remember God? In my whole life, from all the married couple I have ever met, only one person had given me the full explanation of it and I really appreciate that answer and I will hold it till there is a better answer than that.

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The question is, do we really have the capacity to do that? Do we really remember God (or just focusing on horny and pervert things) at that “critical” moments? How should I know? I’m not married yet. But that one person had given me the insight with the simplest analogy that made me understand the whole story. He even explained to me in “which part” of fucking that is considered as the real ‘ibadah’ whereby we will appreciate God for it. I really remember that time as we discussed this matter in KHDN (Kementerian Hasil Dalam Negeri) while waiting our turn in the long birocracy que. Thus, thanks for that person for giving me the insight, even though I am not married yet.

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However, that is not the one that we are really discussing here. Maybe one day (after I experience it my self) it will be written in a specific entry.

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“The Immortals? Let’s put the name to the test..!!”

(King Leonidas, from the movie 300)

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Why do humans breed? Why do humans fuck? The answer is very simple:

“Because it’s so darn fuckin’ good!!”

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Sama ada kita sedar atau tidak, mengongkek adalah satu-satunya nikmat ‘syurga’ yang ‘dipinjamkan’ di muka bumi ini. Takde benda lain lagi yang sedapnya sebagaimana mengongkek. (Well, if you ask me, I really don’t know well about it. I’m just telling you what has been told to me and with some ‘supporting materials’. Hey, why do you look at me that way? At least I’m SEARCHING for the answers!!). Hatta time masa kat UTP dulu pun ada member yang bagi satu biskut yang sedap gila, yang mana kesedapan biskut tu tak dapat nak digambarkan dan diperkatakan, lalu digunakan satu istilah yang bersangkutan dengan mengongkek untuk menggambarkan kesedapannya.

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“Amacam? Sedap tak biskut tu?”

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“Sedap sial..!! Sedap macam p****t!! Hahahahah!!”

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Lalu biskut itu pun diberi nama Biskut P.

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Apa lagi yang membuatkan kita rasa nikmat? Berak? In a matter of speaking, may be yes. But truth be told, tiada ‘berak’ di syurga. Maka ia tidak setanding dengan nikmat syurga sebagaimana nikmat mengongkek. Carilah bahan bacaan memana sekalipun yang berkenaan mengongkek (buku panduan ke, novel gersang ke, cerita seks kat internet ke, dokumentari seks ke, citer blue yang bukan lakonan ke), rata-rata mentafsirkannya dengan satu perkataan sahaja – sedap. Kalau bukan sebab sedap, maka takdelah Jordan Capri nak kata: “Ouh yeah~ Harder~ Deeper~ Faster~ Nyiaa~” dengan "khusyuk" sampai berpeluh-peluh badan dan kuyu bijik mata hinggakan yang nampak cuma mata putihnya. Isn’t it?

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Ok, now what is the relation of this ”sedapness” (pleasure) and the question of ”why do humans breed?”. You are educated person. Surely you have the picture right now. Hey, wait..!! Not THAT picture!! That’s libido, you pervert. Even though I’m a bit pervy, I’m not focusing about that in here. When we relate those two things together, another question arises:

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“What do humans actually seek in fucking? Is it the objective to breed, or the pleasure of it?”

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Will the human actually thinks about breeding? Nah, forget it!! If they really think about it, surely there were no adulteries or anak luar nikah issues. Surely it’s about the pleasure of it. Thus, we also can conclude that marriage also is (and always be) about sex and fucking. Yeah, I know, there are SOME (not all) of those hypocrite assholes who would deny that and said that “marriage is more than that, it’s not just about sex, bla.. bla.. bla..”

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Well, to those hypocrite assholes, if you truly hang dependant on your answer, if you really said that there is higher objective in marriage instead of that fucking and sex, prove to me that it is so. Find any married couple that had been married for years but doesn’t even have any sex (read: FUCKING) even once with his/her spouse just because they want to serve that “higher purpose”. Or would you want to test it yourself to prove it to me? Then do it. Don’t just say it!!

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Can you do it? Do you have the gut to prove it? Or are you afraid to be called “stupid” because you didn’t even use your “blunt sword” or “righteous hole” when you had the chance? So, where the hell is you “higher purpose” that you’ve said earlier, to be the first in the list of priority? Huh, just as I thought.. Fuckin’ hypocrites. They are as the same as the Elders (towards The Oracle) in the temple on the mountain in the movie 300. If you watch that movie, then you know what I mean.

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Apabila diteliti mengenai kesedapan mengongkek tadi, timbul pula satu soalan; Mengapa Tuhan meletakkan nikmat kesedapan itu pada perlakuan tersebut? Well, if you look in the Spiderman’s point of view, the answer may be; Great ‘power’ comes with great responsibility. Or from the Full Metal Alchemist’s point of view; The Law of Equivalent Trade. But if we look deeper in the “Dalang” point of view (refer to Entry 41), now that is what we call as MUSLIHAT.

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Why “muslihat” (deception)? Because humans hate responsibilities. More responsibilities mean more workloads. More workloads mean lesser free time to enjoy. And it is human nature to prefer enjoyable moments rather than serious working moments. But God is very wise. Strategically, He puts a great responsibility to all human being just exactly beneath that particular ‘enjoyable moments’. Yes, it may sounds like a conspiracy, but that is the truth.

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While the humans are lured by that sedapness, they are also given the responsibility for it. Kenapa perlu diselindungkan tanggungjawab di sebalik kesedapan tersebut? Kerana kalau tak, tobat la manusia dengan sukarelanya nak bela anak. Takde siapa pun manusia kat dunia ni yang nak menyusahkan diri. Semua kalau boleh nak senang je. Kalau manusia tak mau tanggungjawab tu, maka tak membiaklah baka manusia. Bila tak membiak, apa gunanya?

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Itu pasal la ada yang sanggup buang anak. Sebab nak sedap je, tapi taknak bertanggungjawab. Cumanya jenis ni tak mau fikir dan memperdalami ’muslihat’ yang dihasilkan oleh The Greatest Dalang of All Realms.

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That is how the world works. That is how He wants it to be. And that is His strategy – deception. Memberikan keuntungan terhadap makhlukNya supaya melakukan sesuatu yang mereka sendiri tak mau buat, tapi mereka buat dalam keadaan tak disedari pun yang sebenarnya ia telah dirancang dengan penuh rapi dan teliti oleh Nya di sebalik nikmat kesedapan yang diimpikan oleh semua manusia normal.

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Is it bad?

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No, it’s not.

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Is this ‘deception’ actually means that in all of our whole life, we were all actually tricked by it?

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No. Actually, it is the truth. And He doesn’t even care if you know the truth or not because He knows that you really want THAT ‘enjoyable moments’.

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Why it is hidden all these time?

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Hidden? It was there all the time, all along. Only you didn’t realize it.

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This is madness..!!

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“Madness..? THIS.. IS.. SPARTAAA!!”

(King Leonidas, from the movie 300)

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Oh my God!! At last, one of my quests has already completed. Oh yeah bebeh!! Do you know what it is? Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the one I’ve been looking for in Entry 48:

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Perh.. Lepas ni makin rajin la aku nak bukak entry ni semata-mata nak tengok iklan tu. Argh!! Geramnya!! At least we gain something new here: GADIS TU ORANG THAILAND. Demn, patut la lawa semacam je. This is my supporting material that proves that she’s from Thailand:

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Hmm.. Aku lagi suka time dia free hair daripada ikat rambut. Nah, terbukti daripada gerak mulut dan percakapannya, dia guna bahasa Siam. Memang sah orang Siam. Since she is not so popular like The Queen Of Cute, her info is quite hard to find just by surfing through the Internet. Thus, my next mission is to find more info about that girl (Nampak sangat tengah sangap takde keje). Wahahahahah!! But for now, I just only know her name, Anastasia Kovba. Hohoho..

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Ok, cukup bab intro. Sekarang kita fokus kepada isi. Apabila dikait-kaitkan entry-entry sebelum ini, secara tak langsungnya ia menjurus ke arah topik SENI. Mana taknya, dah dok cerita pasal Sun Tzu Was A Sissy, yang mana Sun Tzu itu sendiri adalah penulis The Art Of War (Seni Perperangan). Memandangkan Entry 72 itu diakhiri dengan video mengenai seni tarian oleh orang-orang mati (Fallen Art), maka itulah bab yang ingin diberi penekanan pada entry kali ini.

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Thus, the question is:

“What the fuck is SENI?”

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Aku sangat tertarik dengan jawapan tidak langsung yang diberikan oleh Kak Mas (sila rujuk side menu di bawah kategori "Gadis" atau klik saja di sini) dalam entry dia yang kebetulan sehaluan dan boleh dijadikan supporting material untuk apa yang ingin disampaikan di sini. Analogi yang digunakan amat mudah dan simple sekali - stereogram. So, that is part of the answer about seni.

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Dalam istilah mudahnya (yang tak ikut kamus pun), SENI bermakna halus, susah untuk diteliti, tetapi sangat bernilai dan bermakna kepada mereka yang dapat menilainya. Tafsiran mereka yang dapat melihatnya pula akan menjurus ke arah keindahan dan kecantikan. Itu kalau seni yang boleh dilihat. Kalau seni yang menggunakan deria pendengaran, tafsiran keindahan itu akan menjurus ke arah kemerduan, kelunakan, dsb. Begitu juga untuk deria-deria yang lain. Dalam bahasa mudahnya, "hanya jauhari yang mengenal manikam".

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Tetapi adakah bermakna sesuatu yang seni itu hanya fantasi dan tidak wujud sama sekali? Tak semestinya. Istilah-istilah seperti "makhluk seni" dan "makhluk halus" itu sendiri dah cukup untuk merungkai jawapannya. Halus, seni, tak dapat nak dilihat (kalau nampak pun cuma jelmaan-jelmaan je), tetapi kewujudannya ada. Itulah kehebatan dan kehalusan seni Bahasa Melayu. The existence of the true meaning beneath the terms used. Sama sebagaimana gambar-gambar stereogram dalam entry Kak Mas tersebut.

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Apa yang pasti, bukan semua orang boleh "menjiwai" sesuatu seni. Bukan semua orang reti tengok stereogram. Ada yang dah cuba berpuluh-puluh kali tengok satu gambar stereogram, pun tak jumpa-jumpa lagi jawapannya. Ada pula yang sekali tengok je dah nampak gambar di sebalik gambar tersebut. Ada yang setelah melihatnya, rasa seolah-olah ia perkara biasa je. Tetapi ada yang setelah melihatnya, berasa kagum dan terpesona dengan cara susunan dan proses untuk menghasilkan satu karya yang sedemikian.

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Semua bergantung kepada setakat mana kita tertarik dan berminat terhadap sesuatu itu dan menilainya sama ada ia amat berharga atau tidak pada diri kita sendiri. Sesetengah orang, tak minat stereogram tetapi menilai kesenian itu pada lukisan-lukisan kanvas seperti Mona Lisa, The Last Supper dan lelain. Ada pula yang tak minat sangat pada lukisan yang berwarna tetapi lebih tertarik kepada sketching ataupun inking semata-mata. Ada juga yang tak minat semua tu, tapi lebih berminat ke arah lukisan komik atau manga. Semua mempunyai citarasa memasing.

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Tetapi itu adalah pada perkara yang boleh dilihat. Apabila ia adalah suatu yang boleh dilihat, bermakna kesenian itu lebih banyak ditumpukan pada struktur luaran, fizikal dan presentation. Tetapi bukan semua orang menilainya sebegitu. Hanya "jauhari" sahaja yang menjiwai keindahan seninya hingga ke lubuk hati. Jenis ni la kalau kita tengok kat musium seni, orang-orang yang dok lama berminit-minit meneliti gambar yang dipamerkan – walhal gambar abstrak yang macam contengan budak sekolah tadika je pun.

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For example, I really like comics. Usually, if I buy a comic, I will read it three times. Only then I feel satisfied. Why? Because I wanna ‘feel’ the comic. Not just reading it. The first time, I concentrate 80% on the dialogues, and 20% on the drawings. The second time, I concentrate 80% on the drawings and 20% on the dialogues (since I already understand the flow of the story). The third time, while browsing from block to block, I imagine as if it was a movie – animate the comic itself in my mind. The box of picture is considered as the screen of a TV, and the picture in it is the view from a camera.

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When I imagine it like that, then I will understand the way of presentation, the angle of views, and the liveliness (and feelings) of the characters. And it takes about 45 minutes (for standard Chinese comics like Pedang Setiawan). Now, that is "art" in my point of view when I menjiwai it. You, I dunno la. You have your own view about "visual" art. Then use your own experience la as the analogy.

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Lebih ketara lagi apabila kita meneliti pada sudut musik. Ada yang minat hanya pada rentak. Ada pula yang minat pada lirik (seni bahasa). Ada pula lebih berminat pada seni alat musik itu sendiri. Ada yang minat musik hanya kerana artis yang menyampaikannya je. Semua bergantung kepada citarasa dan sudut penelitian memasing la. Lain orang, lain acuannya.

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Sesetengah orang, apabila mendengar lagu Death Metal (atau Speed Metal dan Grind Metal), yang mereka dengar hanyalah bunyi bising yang buat bingit telinga je. As for me, that is one of the art of music yang aku kagumi.

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Kenapa? Sebab kehebatan band tersebut menyembunyikan bunyi-bunyi dan note-note instrumen diorang dalam lagu tersebut hingga yang dipertonjolkan hanyalah bunyi bising sahaja. Tetapi kalau try dengar banyak kali (maunya 6-7 kali jugak), dan hanya fokus kepada satu-satu instrumen (gitar, base atau drum sahaja) diorang tu bukan goreng kosong je. Setiap satunya ada rentak memasing, ada nada memasing. Lepas dah identify setiap rentak, dicompiledkan, barulah nampak seninya. Now that is a high class art of music.

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Ada yang kata lagu-lagu Black Metal ni teruk, lirik mengarut lagi menyesatkan. Some of them may be true. Tetapi kalau dah dok tengok situ, maka tak belajar la benda lain. One of my sources in learning English (especially classic English), is from that genre of music that you called as ‘menyesatkan’. Kumpulan Cradle Of Filth gave the biggest contribution for that. For example, lyrics like:

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Yang mengolah kekecewaan dan frust yang amat sangat sampai rasa nak mati:

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“Cold was my soul, untold was the pain.. I faced when you left me a rose in the rain.. So I swore to the razor that never enchained.. Would your dark nails of faith be pushed through my veins again..”

(Cradle of Filth – Nymphetamine)

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Yang mengolah kejelitaan (beauty in darkness):

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“She was Divinity’s creature that kisses in cold mirror.. A queen of snow, far beyond compared. Lips attuned to symmetry sought her everywhere, dark liquored eyes, an Arabian nightmare..”

(Cradle of Filth – Her Ghost in the Fog)

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Yang melambangkan kerinduan yang amat sangat:

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“Sick and weak in my condition.. This lust is vampyric addiction.. To her alone in full submission.. Non better.. Nymphetamine..”

(Cradle of Filth – Nymphetamine)

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Yang mengolah suasana permulaan sebuah tragedi:

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"The moon, she hangs like a cruel portrait.. Soft winds whisper the bidding of trees.. As this tragedy starts with a shattered glass heart.. And the midnightmare trampling of dreams.. But no.. No tears please.. Fear and pain may accompany death.. But it is desire that shepherds it’s certainty as we shall see…"

(Cradle of Filth – Her Ghost in the Fog)

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Yang mengolah bab jiwang:

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“If only I could have wept in mourning by her side.. I would have clasped her so tight like storm-beached Aphrodite drowned on Kytherean tides, and kissed her.. For from her alone, my lips would have known enigmas of shadowy vistas..”

(Cradle of Filth – Bathory Aria)

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Hoih.. Jangan memain beb.. Lirik lagu yang kome kata "buat sakit telinga" tu jauh lagi kaw-kaw punya jiwang daripada Celine Dion punya lagu My Heart Will Go On yang bertahan dalam carta yang entah berapa bulan tu. Mungkin takde la setanding Shakespear atau A. Samad Said. Tapi nak buat macam mana, I’m a slow reader. Leceh nak membaca. Lepas tu nak imagine intonasi yang sesuai dan visualize apa yang digambarkan penulis. Banyak benda yang nak dibayangkan. So, dengar lagu la lagi senang.

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Tu baru lirik. Campur lagi dengan gitar, bass dan drum, (and not to mention, suara yang jerit stok mengalahkan anjing melalak – dah satu hal la pulak nak identify apa benda yang dijeritkannya tu) lagi sedap. Nampak macam semua yang diolah itu berlaku dalam jiwa yang kacau. Perh, masyuk sial.. Tapi tu zaman muda-muda dulu la. Sekarang ni dengar lagu-lagu Dance atau Trance je – utk kasi motivate time keje. Tapi kalau time ada boss masuk bilik ofis aku ke, tuko la ke lagu oldies stok 70an atau 80an. Wahahahahah!!

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Dengan kata lain, dalam setiap apa kategori sekalipun, pasti akan ada seninya yang tersendiri. Sesetengah orang not very interested in that particular thing, and just anggap ia sebagai satu perkara normal sahaja. Tetapi pada orang yang lain, perkara tersebut pastinya menjadi bahan minatnya untuk dikaji secara mendalam hingga mengetahui hakikat sebenar dan seni yang terselindung di sebalik perkara tersebut.

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Bab makan contohnya. Ia adalah satu perkara normal. But for certain person, the preparation of it and the taste of it is considered as an ”art”. Contoh simple, siri Iron Chef atau anime Yakitate Japan atau Cooking Master Boy. Melalui situ, kita dapat melihat sendiri apakah seni dalam bahan yang pada kita simple je – makanan.

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Kalau bab makan, aku suka jadi jenis macam Kuroyanagi dalam cite Yakitate Japan (mengunyah sambil identify apa ingredient yang dipakai oleh tukang masak, dengan menggunakan deria lidah dan deria bau). Tapi takde la komen atau bagi reaction yang bukan-bukan macam Kuroyanagi tu. For me, that is some kind of "art" also – meneliti suatu yang halus dan tak nampak, tetapi wujud melalui analisis rasa dan bau dalam campuran semua makanan dan terselindung di sebalik rasa-rasa yang lain.

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Ada satu lagi cabang seni yang mana aku sendiri masih tak explore sepenuhnya dan memahami mengenainya. Iaitu hasil seni yang melibatkan ”sentuhan”. Kalau pada sudut jenis lasak (bergasak, bertumbuk, bersilat), tu dah try la and I really love it. Dari situlah baru aku start kenal apa itu “seni”. Dan kalau bukan sebab itu, tak wujud entry ni. Pada pandangan orang, nampak seolah-olah menggunakan segala kudrat untuk menjatuhkan musuh, tetapi sebenarnya menggunakan ”seni” supaya tenaga yang digunakan hanya sedikit, tetapi impaknya besar.

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Tapi kalau pada sudut hasil seni macam dalam iklan arak Hennessy V.S.O.P. kat wayang tu, itu aku masih tak faham lagi. Aku faham yang dia punya art tu adalah tafsiran sentuhannya terhadap pergerakan angin yang terhasil daripada pergerakan subway train. Aku faham hasil seni dia yang kehujanan tu adalah tafsirannya mengenai bagaimana perasaannya bila kita bermandi hujan. Aku juga faham tafsiran seninya pada lukisan atas bangunan yang menjelaskan mengenai bagaimana rasanya berada di puncak sesuatu tempat dan melihat pemandangan yang seluas dan sejauh mata memandang. Tapi kalau dia tak kasitau macam mana situasi dia melukis, pastu terus kasi aku lukisan dia untuk aku sentuh dan merasanya, tobat la aku tatau nak jelaskan macam mana. Huhuhu..

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Kalau seni sentuhan pada bab-bab atas katil, tu lambat lagi la untuk aku belajar. Muahahahah!! Yang tu, memang aku tak tau “seni”nya lagi. Yang aku tau cuma hipotesis-hipotesis standard je. Mana aku belajar? That is out of the question. Yang tu kena tanya my great Guru Utama –The Queen Of Cute. Hahahahah!!

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Berbalik kepada bab persilatan, atas sebab itulah ada perbezaan antara istilah "seni silat" dengan "silat seni". Besar bezanya. Sangat besar. Apakah perbezaannya? Itu kome tanya la orang lain. Aku malas nak menjawab. Kasi gerak skit tulang empat kerat kome tu berusaha skit untuk mencari jawapannya sendiri. Tetapi untuk mereka yang mengaji kitab tua oleh ulama’ mukhtabar yang bertajuk Pendekar Laut, aku rasa analogi berikut pastinya memudahkan korang untuk memahami perbezaannya:

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• Silat Seni = Kuasa HP

• Seni Silat = Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan

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Di mana Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan itu hanya dapat mencapai tahap yang terhebat apabila seseorang jaguh handalan itu mencapai tahap penghayatan yang maksimum terhadap hikmat-hikmat yang dilancarkannya. Berbeza dengan Kuasa HP yang lebih tertumpu pada kekuatan semata-mata. Lebih tinggi Kuasa HP, maka lebih hebat kerosakan yang dilakukan. Tetapi jika seseorang jaguh handalan itu mempunyai Kuasa HP yang maksimum tetapi Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan yang sedikit, dia pasti kecundang di tangan jaguh yang mempunyai kehebatan Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan yang maksimum, walaupun Kuasa HP nya sedikit.

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Kalau kepada sesiapa yang layan Dragonball pula, Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan itu adalah pada ketika Son Goku landing di planet Nameck, time melawan puak-puak Fliza. Pengawalan kuasa yang hebat, penjimatan tenaga yang optimum, tetapi dinaikkkan gila-gila kuasa tersebut untuk memberi kerosakan yang maksimum hanya pada ketika menyerang musuh, hanya beberapa detik sebelum serangan mengenai musuh – yang kemudiannya diturunkan mendadak selepas serangan sudah mengenai sasaran. Ye la, kalau dah lelaki, mana boleh tegang 24/7 ye tak? Time nak “pakai” je la baru kasi keras. Karang kalau keras je manjang, kot kalau jatuh tangga kang patah pulak. Kot masuk LRT kang orang tak selesa plak ada benda yang menujah-nujah.

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Those are the simplest analogies to understand what is ”seni”. Apabila diteliti semula, komponen yang penting untuk seseorang itu memahami seni adalah pada PENGHAYATANnya sendiri terhadap perkara tersebut. Hanya apabila kita menghayati sepenuhnya, barulah kita sampai ke satu tahap di mana pemahaman itu adalah pemahaman yang hakiki. Kita bukan sekadar hanya MENGENALI sahaja, malah MENGETAHUI, MEMAHAMI dan MENJIWAI sepenuhnya perkara tersebut seolah-olah ia telah sebati dengan diri.

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Apabila kita sudah memahami sepenuhnya mengenai seni tadi, kalau ada orang lain yang melaksanakan perkara tersebut di hadapan kita, dengan hanya sekilas pandang, pasti kita tahu sama ada ia betul atau tidak, sempurna atau tidak, malah boleh mengetahui sebab-musabab kenapa berlakunya kesilapan-kesilapan (biarpun ia adalah satu perkara yang kecil) tadi. Malah boleh memperbetulkannya.

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Itu pada sudut luaran. Pada mereka yang lebih advance pula,  Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan terhadap seni itu bukan lagi hanya bertumpu kepada gerak luaran, tetapi ditambah pula dengan kekuatan dan pemahaman terhadap setiap falsafah dan ilmu yang terselindung di sebalik hak luaran tadi. Maka barulah ia menjadi sebati dengan diri dan menjurus ke arah Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan yang maksimum.

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Kalau pada sudut agama, kita tengok pada bab yang simple je – solat. Tidak dinafikan, banyak jaguh handalan yang mempunyai Kuasa HP yang hebat – solat 5 waktu, ditambah dengan solat sunat kasi kaw-kaw punya banyak rakaat, dan kalau boleh, 24/7 nak duduk terperap dalam masjid – dalam amalan seharian. Tetapi berapa ramaikah jaguh handalan yang betul-betul mempunyai penghayatan maksimum (Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan) pada "seni" solat itu sendiri?

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A deeper example – pada bacaan sujud dan rukuk. Banyak jaguh handalan yang mempunyai Kuasa HP untuk baca bacaan tersebut sebanyak 3 kali setiap kali solat. Tetapi berapa ramaikah jaguh handalan yang yang mempunyai Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan untuk membacanya elok-elok instead of baca laju nak mampus semata-mata nak cukupkan 3 kali?

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Jaguh-jaguh handalan yang hanya fokus pada Kuasa HP, mereka ini lebih mementingkan KUANTITI. Atas sebab itu, sama ada cepat atau lambat, yang penting, deme baca 3 kali. Kalau lambat, boleh baca secara normal. Tapi kalau nak cepat, disebabkan nak cukupkan bacaan sebanyak 3 kali, maka laju nak mampus la jadinya. Tu belum masuk bab solat Terawih atau zikir time wirid yang 33-33-34 tu. Come on man, dah nama pun Kuasa HP, yang penting damage kasi banyak supaya musuh ditumbangkan secepat mungkin. Sebab tu kena depends on kuantiti HP (Horse Power) semata-mata. Ayoyo..

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Berbeza dengan jaguh-jaguh handalan yang mempunyai Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan, mereka ini lebih mementingkan KUALITI. Cara pendekatannya lebih simple, tidak terlalu lemah, tetapi pada tahap optimum yang cukup-cukup untuk menumbangkan musuh supaya jimat tenaga. Kalau banyak masa, baca la 3 kali DENGAN TERTIB DAN PENUH ADAB. Kalau nak cepat sebab tak cukup masa, baca sekali je sudahlah but still dengan tertib dan beradab. Nak cepat, dan nak juga baca 3 kali tapi dengan tertib? Solat la pada lewat waktu skit time takde gangguan - that’s why waktu solat tu dijadikan ada tempohnya.. itu pun talak boleh pikir ka?

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Kalau time wirid berjemaah, jaguh Kuasa HP kalau zikir 33-33-34 tu cukup bilangannya (sebab laju). Jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan pulak tak cukup (sebab baca slow dengan penuh adab), lantaklah.. Kerana yang penting, bukan pada BILANGANNYA, tetapi setakat mana seseorang jaguh handalan itu menjiwainya dan memuji dengan penuh keikhlasan.

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Jaguh Kuasa HP buat Terawih banyak rakaat (20++) kat masjid (tapi stok macam ayam patuk makanan je) kerana lebih mementingkan ’kuantiti’ jemaah dan bilangan rakaat. Jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan bukannya buat sebab ”nak kasi cepat habis” atau ”sekadar melepaskan batuk di tangga”. Sebab itu lebih rela buat sensorang, biarpun sedikit je rakaatnya, tapi penuh tertib.

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Jaguh Kuasa HP kalau boleh nak kasi hafal satu Quran – semata-mata nak digelar Tahfiz? Lantaklah.. Jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan pula lebih suka biar hafal sedikit je ayat Quran tetapi pemahaman penghayatan terhadapnya kaw-kaw dan mendalam hingga sebati dengan diri dan perlakuan harian.

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Untuk geng-geng The Others dan Skuad Racun (if you are there and have the time reading this entry because you are sick and have a letter from your doctor that prevents you from suicide bombing - hahahah!! I really like this joke from the cartoon Osama in the previous entry), analoginya simple je:

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“Adakah sama antara orang yang mengetahui (berilmu) itu dengan mereka yang tidak mengetahui (berilmu)?”

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Atau:

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”Antara seorang ’abid (jaguh Kuasa HP) dengan seorang ulama’ (jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan), manakah yang lebih baik?”

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We cannot outrun the reality. Disebabkan perubahan medan magnetik bumi, majoriti penduduk bumi adalah jaguh-jaguh handalan Kuasa HP. Sangat sedikit jaguh-jaguh handalan Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan. Yang lebih teruk pulak ialah lagi ramai jaguh Kuasa HP yang tak sedar diri dan self-proclaimed yang diri itu adalah seorang jaguh handalan Kuasa Tahap kesempurnaan.

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Jaguh-jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan seperti Zonan, Xinan, Sang Hitam, Jerung Rasaksa dan Orga bukannya tak boleh nak bersihkan ’sampah-sampah’ jaguh Kuasa HP ni. Kalau deme nak, mudah je nak menghancurkan mereka. But what’s the point if the fight itself doesn’t give any quality of satisfaction and excitement for themselves? They want quality, not just stupid fight with stupid jaguh Kuasa HP. Kemenangan yang terlalu mudah adalah tidak bermakna kerana tiada kseseronokan dalam usaha mengecapinya. Sama macam beromen jugak. Pancut terus tanpa foreplay apa kelas beb.. Hahahahah!!

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So what are those jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan doing right now? They just wait for anyone who has the same Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan to challenge them, and they will fight it with full excitement and satisfaction. What if a jaguh Kuasa HP ask to challenge them? They just ignore the asshole. But if the jaguh Kuasa HP starts the first attack, only then the jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan will surely beat the hell out from the jaguh Kuasa HP kaw-kaw punya back to the fifth grade.

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Well, that is if it was in a comic. But it would be possible to occur in our real life situation. And I think, it’s already happening.

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So, as a conclusion, SENI is actually very simple:

“Sesuatu yang tak nampak, tetapi keadannya yang kita tak nampak tu bukan bermakna ia tak wujud.”

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Tetapi yang boleh nampak dan menjiwai seni itu sendiri bukannya jaguh handalan Kuasa HP yang biasa, tetapi jaguh Kuasa Tahap Kesempurnaan. Hanya jauhari yang mengenal manikam. And it goes back to our example, the Fallen Art - kebanyakan kita hanya melihatnya pada satu video yang kita sendiri tak memahaminya, tetapi setelah mengetahui “seni”nya, barulah kita faham mengapa tajuknya “Fallen Art”.

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I’ve watched The Pursuit Of Happyness already. Hey, it’s not my typo there. The movie itself spells “happiness” with a “Y” instead of “I”. There is a reason behind it. Only when you watch the movie, then you’ll get the answer.

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Oh man, I’m really weak if I were served with this type of movie – the “from nobody to somebody” type movie, added with the character’s sacrifices, sufferings and hardships just to earn one simple word; success. My heart suffered so much watching that movie just to bear the sadness of the story – also to control my emotion and prevent any tears flowing from my eyes.

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Why? Because based from my experience, I know and understand the hardship to earn success, especially when most people around us look down on us. I think all of you “extenders” surely know what I mean (forget those ‘always success first class honor fuckers students’.. Bohahahahah!!). Thus, I really recommend you to watch this movie.

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Ok, back to the topic. Since my company wanted to provide new activity in our training camps, my supervisor and I were assigned to do a mission – handling the Paintball project. Thus, we will be in charge from seeking suppliers to buy the equipments, to maintenance and events. However, the paintball guns (in which, in Malay, they prefer to call it as “markers” instead of the term “guns” as to elude the concept of ‘war’ – it’s just a game for God sake..!!) had been ordered but not yet arrived.

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As we waited for the equipments to arrive, my supervisor and I had spent that free time in gaining knowledge of paintball through many sources – Internet, books, conversation with suppliers or paintball consultants. In spite of gaining theories, we also must gain the ‘feel’ of the actual game – the practical experience in the game of paintball. And thus, on the 24^th February, with some friends, we played the paintball.

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Armed with the paintball gun and face mask (some of us wore the armor), we were sent in the arena as if we were elite soldiers, paid to kill and eliminate the enemies!! Bohahahahah!! Though Malaysia was saved, the tenuous pact between Team 1 and Team 2 has all but evaporated. The drums of war thunder once again..!!

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What I want to write here actually is not the detail about paintball. But rather, focused on the topic of WAR – the feelings of it, the experience, the fear, and the thrills. Yes, I know. The focus is supposed to be on the big scale reality war, not just the small scale paintball war. However, to understand the big scale reality, we must first feel the small scale “simulation” and experience it as to be the basic reference and simulation of the real time.

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War cannot outrun the true nature of it – violence, gruesome, pain, agony, vicious, tricky and all those which related to it. In simpler and shorter words, war is bad. Everybody hates war. Especially if we were involved in one. Unless..

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“There are those who treat every human interaction as a military engagement that could escalate into a potential battle leading to a nice, satisfying conflict that’s part of a war. There is a name for such people. They’re called assholes.”

(Stanley Bing, Sun Tzu was a Sissy)

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Simple example, just look at the situations in Middle East. Or if that is too far, just look at our ‘upper floor neighbor’. Do we really want to live in those situations? Do our family and children’s growth secured? And what will become of us if we live there? Do I have the time to write this blog? Or do you have the time to read this entry? Or perhaps right now we weren’t even here at all due to our body that has already decayed or became ashes, burnt and destroyed by our choice of action to become a suicide bomber.

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However, not all war was that evil (but yet, THEY ARE STILL BAD). Only when one’s life in the brinks of death and fear, one can find and discover his/her true self. Or perhaps, one’s true destiny. There are some people who benefits from war, and thus made them a well respected person. Adolf Hitler for example. A loser who has an ambition of mastering in arts, but became the most fearsome and respected leader of world wars. Or other example, Sun Tzu. If it was not because of war, his ideas and philosophy sure were just craps of bullshit - which then gave profit to Stanley Bing.

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The question is, when a person was pushed to the limit, pushed to the edge until his/her life (or other things such as career, wealth or love ones) was in danger, does he/her really DISCOVERS his/her true self (and destiny), or does he/she actually CREATES his/her true self (and destiny)? It’s not a good idea to discuss about this (discovery and creation) right now since we are more focusing on WAR. Maybe I shall discuss it later in other entry.

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As said before, one’s true self will unearth itself as he/she was pushed to the limit (well, this is one of the methods of knowing one’s true self without getting him/her drunk with alcohol). That is what happened when my friends and I played paintball. At that time, then we know our true nature, either we are:

• Courageous or just cowards.

• Noble or just sneaky.

• Dexterity type or just agility type.

• Teamwork or lone ranger.

• Planner or executor.

• Street smart or book smart.

• And most importantly, ruthless or soft hearted.

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Only then I understood the exact true element to be delivered in many war or combat movies – TRUE SELF..!! Sometimes, as we watch those movies, we thought that it was so simple just to be like the heroes in those movies – courageous, able to motivate others, able to plan perform well, and of course, able to uphold justice. But the truth is, it is so damn fucking hard to be like that. You don’t believe it? Then go play paintball (or other sports that contain risk, danger and pushes you to the limit) to prove it.

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When talking about war movies, I’m not talking about Lord Of The Ring (so epic and so bullshit with hocus pocus and monster stuffs) or The Chronicles Of Narnia (so “safe” without even a drop of blood and so bullshit as if the war must fulfill the standards by DOSH or OSHA) or Rambo (worse than bullshit – just one man who can defeat the whole country?? What the fuck hell??). I’m talking about Braveheart, The Patriot, Troy, or Kingdom Of Heaven. The legendary wars with legendary (or if not so legendary, at least with great) leaders.

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Maybe the new upcoming movie, 300 may be included in the list (if they fight human instead of monsters). Girls and gays surely love this movie – tough men wielding their swords, slashing here and there. And wearing underwear + mantle in battle?? What the fuck hell?? Shouldn’t they wear armors (or trousers at least) for God sake..!!

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So, let’s focus on one of those. I prefer Braveheart. Why? Because it was the first war movie that impressed me so much – able to arouse my interest towards war movies. And I am sure, most of you had watched this movie. If you do, you surely remember this part:

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The greatest part in that movie that had given me a great motivation and impact for me. The true form of leadership, charisma, power and of course, the most deeply and poisonous persuasion. Just imagine, from the young William Wallace who has nothing, who despise and always avoids conflicts, transformed into “that person” who leads a war.

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However, the ending of that movie is so sad, thus, dispersed my motivation. But I understand the message beneath the sad ending; “Freedom, will be traded with a high price to gain it completely”.. Yeah, yeah.. Whatever.. However, I rather prefer this ending:

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Now, that’s more like it.. Like he had said before, “fireballs from his eyes and thunderbolt from his arse~!!” Bohahahahahah!!

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Ok, back to our issue. Thus, what is the real concept of WAR in Islamic point of view? Was it to suicide bombing here and there? Was it has only one objective; “Fuck Annihilate the fucking hostile fuckers infidels!!”..? Was it to uphold rights and justice? Was it just to defend one’s self (or the community itself)? So what is the real concept of war?

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When we go deeper into the history of Islam, one question must be answered first:

“Are all those ‘slashing swords thingy’ are actually the war, or just battles?”

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I think you already know the answer. And I also think that all of you already knew what the war is, and what the battles are. So, I don’t have to explain them further. So, as you have already know all of that, perhaps you also know what is the true purpose of the war, and the true purpose of the battles. Thus, relate it with the current condition.

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The questions are, is the current situation that has been happening is the true war, or just useless battles? Were the actions and insights of most Muslims nowadays truly parallel with the original understanding of war and battle like in the past? Were the implementations are correct or just a waste of time, money and of course, wasting lives? These are the questions that we must think and find the answers.

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Oh man, I wish I had that ‘motion capture’ thing. Damn..!! It’s soo cool..!! (and also made the animation for 3d animation process easier).

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All right, back to the issue. What intrigues me is when a person said to me about what he had red in Chef Li’s book (do I spell his name correctly?), - which I don’t know what the book’s title is - about “bombing”. (Note: Chef Li is the author of Jutawan Senyap book).

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In that book, it was said that his ‘mentor’ had said:

“Instead of suicide bombing and destroying the facilities (such as the WTC, Pentagon or the soldiers), why not the Muslims try to “bomb” the business markets with very good and high quality products?”

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What can I say? Majority of typical Muslims always understand the outer meaning without thinking the deeper meaning. Always see the “jihad” thingy as “dead meat”. Even the so called ‘sissy’ by Stanley Bing (Sun Tzu) supports what had been said by Chef Li’s mentor and somehow, the similar thing:

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“There are five ways of attacking with fire. The first is to burn soldiers in their camp; the second is to burn stores; the third is to burn baggage trains; the fourth is to burn arsenals and magazines; the fifth is to hurl dropping fire amongst the enemy.”

(Sun Tzu, The Art Of War)

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Come on man, get real..!! Why still choose the most difficult one (to blow people the fuck hell up like Tantuya)? Why choose the hardest (which gives the greatest resistance – can use fire extinguisher or just call for back up / replaced with substitute soldiers) while the other FOUR (yes, you can destroy FOUR things instead of just ONE!!) are easier and don’t even retaliate when you burn them? Why nowadays typical Muslims prefer to die rather than to live? What can you do if you die anyway? You can’t even change a thing – even to clean up your own grave!! Sheesshh..!!

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At least, when we choose what was said by Chef Li’s mentor, we still can do many LEGAL bombings without even had to suicide ourselves. And the best thing is, no lives will be sacrificed. At least this is rather useful and helps others rather than dying and left your family starves like shit. Come on man, we are not barbarians. We are civilized human for God sake..!! Thus, act like one, duh..!!

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Just thinking of these “unparallel” things just makes me sick. Unparallel with history, unparallel with the true understanding, and most of all, unparallel with logical and rational thinking. It also made my motivation level go straight down to the ground. Am I living in a crazy world, or is it because I am the one who is crazy here?

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Thus, I have to keep my sanity. I must survive this. Oh what should I do? Perhaps this “Fallen Art” could maintain my sanity:

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Damn, if I had many loyal (but useless) armies, perhaps I will use them like that. Kah! Kah! Kah!

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Perhaps the real war is not fighting the terrorists or the infidels. Maybe, the real war is within “Nosgoth”, the war to crumble the big wall of shit and think outside the box instead of that narrow-minded thinking and insights. Or maybe, the real war in one’s self is as the same as the big scale war’s objective: TO TAKE CONTROL..!!

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I don’t know..

You know it better than me..

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“Do you know who will inherit the earth? Arms dealers.. Because everybody else is busy killing each other..”

(Yuri Orlov, from the movie Lord Of War)

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